For the first time since August - Kopi Club is back in the same time zone! We are excited to be working under the same daylight again. Although the full KC reunion won’t be for a couple weeks (quarantine first, folks), we’re excited to both be in Singapore. Many picnics await 🥐
As a side note, we are just about to hit a next milestone of subscribers! Since April, it’s been incredibly rewarding to see our little community grow. If you’re new here: welcome! We’d love for you to join the Kopi Club family. (And to view this post in all its glory, click on the banner / head to our Substack page!)
N:
A T-Shaped State of Being
This week, I learned about this concept of T-shaped people (thank you, @sambwinslow) – people who are “deep in one area, broadly exposed to others”. I think we all start off as largely I-shaped people – rooted in a vertical, deep, but limited, understanding of the world. An I-shaped person knows only what surrounds them based on the content they read, the places they go, the sensations that are most available. Not enough people realize how easy it is to be stuck in our own strongly held opinions of the world, how comfortable it is to keep tunnelling down that I-shaped path. But the more we seek out friends and partners who are different to us, who expose us to new areas and ideas, the more T-shaped we can become. Havrilesky: “Relishing the company of people who sometimes make you feel, by comparison, uninformed, closed to new ideas, disordered, defensive, rigid, fearful, unambitious is an acquired skill… It humbles you. It dares you to grow.”
In the past, there were things that I considered dichotomous that I now consider fluid. Things that were dull before have now blossomed into color, and taken on new meaning. Sometimes you have to be childlike in this way: endlessly fascinated. Everything becomes interesting when you become interested. But as much as we can strive for this on our own, sometimes we need other people to allow us to access these interests: by taking us to new places, giving us new music to listen to, or things to read. I have been trying to find more people like that in my life, and cherish them. Maybe even try to be that person for others. I am striving for a T-shaped state of being. My perception of life is only my perception, after all, and there is so much more to see.
J:
the psychology of nostalgia
I read recently that nostalgia was once characterized as a mental disorder. When the term was first defined in the 17th century by a physician named Johannes Hofer, it was used to describe the homesickness felt by soldiers fighting wars in foreign lands. Hofer believed that the emotional distress was enough to kill a man. Though our conceptions of nostalgia have since changed, I wonder about the ways Hofer’s ideas continue to affect us: in the way sentimentality can still be read as fragility, or the view that nostalgia is a retreat from the present. A refusal to deal with the situation at hand.
Neuroscientists today, however, have explored the potential benefits of feeling nostalgic. There is now evidence showing how nostalgia combines the brain’s memory and reward circuits. Rather than sadness, nostalgia may actually promote comfort and optimism. It’s a way of looking back on the past and focusing on the things we really value.
There’s this picture I took of the central pathway on campus—Locust Walk—during the heart of autumn.
Perhaps this exercise of looking back and reflecting is a means of understanding that we can choose the way we want to remember things. For all the events that I can’t change, I choose not to focus on the moments of dread – of public breakdowns, or racing to midterms I was wholly unprepared for. Instead, there is everything else I hope to remember with clarity: serendipitous run-ins, echoing laughter; the way Locust looks as we slip into the cooler months.
It was Kishimi who wrote that while we can not alter objective facts, we are still inhabitants of a subjective world. It’s easy to want to disregard the events of the past year. On one hand, I am incredibly tempted to nudge 2020 into my psychological blind spot. But a desire to begin a more hopeful year does not mean we can simply do away with the last. Though it is neither possible nor productive to make these losses disappear, it is in our control to hold on to the good.
N:
Some songs that make me want to get up and dance
J:
I’m sure we’re all aware that Spotify has released their Wrapped recap for this past year. While some of my top picks were entirely unsurprising (it’s all the Fine Line for me), I’d like to highlight the songs that my Spotify Wrapped did d i r t y:
Came it at #75, but really should have been in the Top 10:
Also - how did these tracks not even make it to the Top 100?:
And finally, a song that came out too recently to make the cut (but I guarantee WILL make it next year):
N:
Things I’ve Saved This Week
A bunch of Alan Watts’ quotes, including these ones:
“You are an aperture through which the Universe is looking at and exploring itself.”
"What exists, reality itself, is gorgeous. It is the plenum, the fullness of total joy."
Solitude = Clarity
I’ve been taking myself out on dates weekly around Singapore and I get ridiculously excited about them, here’s a scene from the top of Supertree observatory.
J:
Paul Rand’s Book Covers
Learning more about design titan Paul Rand in my Typography class (this class in general has been a Feel Good Favorite of the past semester). These images combine everything I’m an absolute nerd for: books, a good typeface, and fun graphic design.
N:
“Every new sensation is a blessing, every anxious thought is a theft” – Havrilesky
My friends already know that my recent WFH uniform also doubles as my attempt to channel my inner Princess Di. Besides the outfits themselves, I love how every post on this account ends with the hashtag, #FyouCC. Some personal favorites:
New rolls of film
Bought my first rolls of both Portra 400 and B&W film before I left Philly! While I am still stuck in the Q for the next two weeks, I can not stress how excited I am to take my Canon around Singapore. In related news: some favorite shots from the last adventures in Philly.
The awkward crop on the red tree is only *slightly* killing me inside
